Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Britney: Can I be your life coach?

I honestly, truly would PAY to be a life coach for Britney Spears. I couldn't pay much (because I don't have much money). But I really would write a $1,000 check payable to Britney Spears. This girl needs serious help!

Actually, I am obsessed with the very idea. I can't get any work done because I am busy planning my life coach curriculum. I would need to move into her house for a few months. We would give the staff (besides one bodyguard) a two week vacation, so she can learn how to be an independent person. She is going to clean her house, cook food and change the boys' diapers.

She would meet with a therapist three times a week. I would bring in a yoga instructor daily. She will pursue a new hobby. I would ask her to get back in touch with her Christian faith, in a new way. She would play with her kids and learn more about parenting. I would arrange a reunion with her parents, and some meetings with Kevin. After a few weeks of restoring her sanity and joy, we would discuss her career.

We would hire new management and staff. We would develop new tactics for a comeback. I would encourage her to do something completely different. Besides a new approach to her music, we would launch another business, perhaps an underwear line since she never seems to have any on. I'm sure she already has some kind of foundation or nonprofit. We work on growing and improving that organization. Oh, and we would definitely hire a new stylist and basically scrap her current wardrobe and start over.

Please, Britney. I promise I can help you!

Friday, September 7, 2007

I Guess I'm a Writer

The Scene: A chic cocktail party in a loft apartment.

Aaron and I meet another couple. We exchange names and hellos.

"So, Emily, what do you do?"

"I'm a writer."

That's it! That's what I do! I write! Okay, that scene never actually took place and probably never will. However, the part about me being a writer is true.

I have quit my day job to pursue writing as a full-time business. I sell words. The next question is the most difficult.

"Oh really? What do you write?"

Basically, I write everything. I write articles. I write books for other people. I write newsletters. I write press releases. I write my own book. I write website copy. I write sales letters. Oh, and I edit, too.

I've wanted a blog for years, but never made the time. My friend Marion said, "Emily, I would love to read a blog you wrote." So I thought the timing perfect, as I tackle this new venture in my life.

I'll post pictures, stories about my life, writing pieces that are actually interesting, social commentary, reviews (on wines, restaurants, movies, books) and maybe some recipes. I'm not sure if anyone will read it except my mom and boyfriend. We'll see ...